Tuesday, June 26, 2007

So effing frustrating

The post refers to the bike referenced in The Bike Incident

P: Can I buy your bike?
Me: For how much?
P: How much did it cost?
Me: $2700.
P: What?!
Me: It's a nice bike. It got me to school and work every day for like 2 years, I wanted a good one.
P: Ok, how much do you want?
Me: What do you think is fair?
P: Well, it was in an accident.
Me: Holy crap, dude. YOU were the one that crashed it!
P: Still, it was crashed, it's not new.
Me: So you're saying I should expect less money from you because it was in an accident that you caused?
P: Why do you make everything I say sound stupid?
Me: All I'm doing is summarizing what you said, if you think it's dumb...
P: Fine, how about $300.
Me: Dude, $300 for a $2700 bike?
P: Well, it was in an accident.
Me: Oh my God, P, you're going to make me shoot myself in the face.
P: Fine $1200.
Me: Ok, that sounds like a deal.
P: Ok.

::: Next Day :::

P: Listen, I can't be held responsible for this bike.
Me: What, your new bike?
P: Yeah, I don't want it.
Me: Honestly, P. You're killing me here.
P: Ok, good, so it's your bike, cause I don't want it.
Me: If you didn't want it, why did you ask if you could.....nevermind. Yes, P, it's still my bike.

33 comments:

Brett said...

One of the main reasons I keep tuning in is that I am simply waiting for you to snap.

Anonymous said...

p is so cute. :)

Dan said...

Why does dumb equal cute? Is it like "cute little bunny rabbit" cute or "oh he shit himself on the bus and doesn't know how to clean it up"... cute? Yeah, I'm obviously confused...

Anonymous said...

Ya know, I've had my fair share of crazy and stupid roommates but damn! You win.

Social Butterfly said...

You're stronger than I am dude. I would've wailed on him by now.

whybother said...

lol! this is awesome. i wish i had a p..wait, no i dont...i feel for you.

Big Harold said...

hahahah he's got a point dude, your bike would be scratched and therefore worth less money :) haha I'm going to test drive a car, ding it, and ask for a lower price.

Illay said...

I don't know how you put up with P. He would have murdered me with his stupidity by now if I had to live with him!

Anonymous said...

The user submissions are funny, but I have yet to read one that is more amazingly awesome than P. Don't ever let him move out! If you do, send him over to Austin to live with me!!

Anonymous said...

Is he really that bad? I mean in my town everyone acts like that.

Anonymous said...

Bro is he really from Canada....if so then i am so sorry...we're not all that bad..really

Anonymous said...

You really should consider writing a book or producing a sitcom. Something along the lines of, "The Life and Times of 'P'". It'd be awesome.

Anonymous said...

thats so veryu funny

JessyB said...

Is P seriously from Canada? I am so humiliated - he's giving us non-amusingly-psychotic Canadians a bad name! That being said, his antics are a goldmine of torturous delight, I don't know how you keep your sanity.

jesse said...

Hey M, does the bike still work, despite the accident?

Anonymous said...

My ex-boyfriend is from Canada and I refer to him as "The Idiot Canadian". His name doesn't being with "P" though.

ZeroWing said...

Hey, Me! Post some new stuff! P can't be acting normal, right? I'm going to feel bad if he's acting normal!

By the way, is the Tron thing done? Were you just waiting 'till he snaps, or are you waiting 'till he goes on a shooting rampage?

You're awesome, dude. And so is P... if he's a real person. He IS a real person, right...?

Krissie said...

This is hilarious!
Do you mind me linking you?
People HAVE TO know!

Trixie said...

Please start spending more time with P! I'm dying waiting for more!!!

broof said...

this is seriously the funniest shit i have ever seen. i want to meet p.

Tom said...

Sounds like one of my old coworkers. Not that I ever got to know him that well, but he was NUTS.

Mike Deal - Broeknrule Records said...

I have only just come across your blog and I can say only 1 thing, genius!

Kent said...

You know what folks? P. isnt that weird and crazy, he's a genius. Yeah really. I think he's just doing a long run experience. He acts like the weirdest dude in the world and wrote on his secret blog people's reactions. His most famous post is about a special "beep" that gives him a lot of comments. A courageous genius because its not that easy to act 24/24...

Holden said...

Your Blog is awesome. Love how you're dealing with stuff... ;)

Dancing With Tears In My Eyes

jelena said...

hi. i'm here for the first time but have a question for you. why did i think of cosmo kramer after i read this last post?

Skynet said...

Your roommate is really an hasshole, I almost feel pity of you lol. Be carefull he could be some kind of psycho and cut you in slices when you are sliping! Especially if he finds out of this blog. lol!

David said...

Unfortunately, if he snaps, we won't be reading about it here. We'll only hear the lame highlight on the 5 o'clock news.

Chica said...

Just lose all hope for P... xD

Anonymous said...

dude.....i want a roomate like that...i will trade you..mine is soo dull and quiet...i want a super freak guy like P all this alien crap and conspiracy theories. i bet he is really into that you should freak him out...like burn crop circles in your carpet LOL

Gail said...

I am a librarian. I could get fired for laughing so loud...

On a more serious note, as amusing as this is, there are times when I think, GET OUT NOW! Say, for example, his rig to, "keep the bad people out."

At least your family will have a well documented account of his spiral into paranoia when they take their wrongful death case to court.

Best of luck.
Gail

PS

My crazy roommate story?

Driving through the west TX hill country...

CRAZY: Hey G, what are those white bushes?

G: Sheep.

jane doe said...

How do you maintain your sanity?

You have a lot of tolerance. I wonder how long that will last until you blow up and go apeshit on his ass. haha

Michael Jones said...

Holy crap. This is both my roommates from fall 2005 smacked together.

Of course, they only were around for a few weeks. Both were returned to sender.

Which is perhaps what needs to happen with P. I mean, as fun as it is to live with a schizophrenic (and I use the term "fun" loosely there - it's cost me $2K at least...) perhaps P should be seeking professional help?

Entertaining him is actually probably not the best of options if he's not on his meds, or isn't aware he should be.

Such folk can be delightfully random. They can be much worse for him or anyone around, depending on what the aliens or doomsayers or what have you plug into his mind at any moment.

Seriously, at first glance things become violent or uncontrolled, get the guy committed. My second roommate (yes, from Canada - but so am I...we're not all that nuts...) caused me to program the local Toronto Police unit in my phone. Just in case. And I almost used it before sending him on his merry way.

Anonymous said...

WE WANT MORE P!!!!
come on dude
or at least an explanation
SOMETHING