P, being a true believer of the aliens, conspiracies, etc, ensures that one of the constants at our humble home is Unsolved Mysteries. Yes, all of the re-runs on Lifetime for Women from the 1980's are recorded diligently, watched, and studied. The subject of tonight's episode / lesson was "Diabolical Minds". This included the black widow; in this case, a woman who poisoned her victims for cash money...
P: That's BULLSHIT!!
Me: What is?
P: You don't have to die, he's WEAK!
Me: She poisoned him.
P: It only worked cause he's depressed! If someone poisoned me, I'd be fine. My mind would take over!
Me: It's poison, you'd die.
P: No! I'm like Rasputin! I would know, and it wouldn't work, you have no idea.
Me: Do you even know how your body works?
P: I know how my mind works, and it's powerful, it can overpower poison.
Me: Poison shuts down your organs, you...nevermind.
P: I'm like Rasputin, you'll see when I don't die.
Me: Ok, dude, poison doesn't work on you.
( about 30 seconds of silence )
P: Do you think balloons go into space?
Me: What!? HAHAHAHAHAHHAAH
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12 comments:
"Do you think balloons go into space?" = WTF? What kind of segue is this??
I ADORE your blog. Please don't stop writing it.
Might I possibly give you another idea if the TRON doesn't do enough?
If you record empty sound -- like leave the recorder on in an empty room and leave for the day -- the tape will invariably record random sounds and electronic artifact noise, etc., which when played back sounds to many people like whispers and murmurs. This hard-wired tendency of the brain to impose order on random noise has been well documented by scientists, and is obviously the reason that many people believe in EVP http://www.aaevp.com/ .
Were you to create such a tape and ask P what he believes he hears, I suspect his tendency toward the random might just produce some very interesting responses.
Just a thought.
Thanks for writing the blog.
I want one. Though I might want to upgrade to a model with an on/off switch. Maybe one with a wine/beer opener instead of a hand too...
kArAndom
Unsolved Mysteries? With Robert Stack? BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! You slay me!
the fact that he is adamant that 'he knows how his mind works' is the most hilarious part. What a kook! How could anyone know how his mind works!
PS: I still love your blog, we want more!
This blog is brilliant. Thanks for sharing this madness with us. It's like post-graduate field work. When this is all over, the college of your choice will practically hand you your Ph.D.
I started reading and I just couldn't stop - am wiping tears from my eyes right now.
I don't know how long you will be able to live with P, but I will be right here (reading about it) with you!
Peace.
Haha. This blog is brillent.
I'm a Psychiatric Nurse and he sounds like a Paranoid Schizophrenic. Classic.
just today (the 10th june) i thought id have a break from exam revsion, i find this website, ive been reading it from the beginning and am crying of laughter! I want a room mate like P!!! please dont ever let him leave your appartment!
This is truly a hilarious blog, but I can't help but to worry about poor P, he shows signs of being a Schizophrenic, or having some kind of mental disease.
This sounds like something me and my best friend would talk about.
I think you should initiate a pillow fight with your roommmate, just to see if he'd wig out.
seems like he reads a lot but his choices of book were wrong..or he chooses to imprinted wrong scripts onto his brain anyway.
does he listen to musics? what kind?
i can see being his roommate is fun!
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